Friday, April 4, 2014

Avery Kathleen Pugh

Three short years ago we had to change the name from Daniel, Ashley, and Jacob to "The DNA Strand" because our little curly-haired Thomas was born. But that was BAK, Before Avery Kathleen. Now it's time to change the picture again!

We've not told her birth story on this blog yet I suppose for a myriad of reasons- for one there are so many more platforms to share information than when Jacob was born almost <gulp> six years ago. Also it is true that we are different people now- different parents who have learned that non-urgent matters are better handled with patience and contemplation.

So with that, on this, Avery's 53rd day, we will recount for you her first breaths.

It was a cold winter. Maybe not too cold- but definitely snowy. The schools were closed for 9 days- 6 more than average. In addition were delays and early releases that accounted for a total amount of 13 full days missed.

A snow storm came on us the first week in February and we wondered what we would do if the baby came early. On Friday, January 31st we went to the hospital after several contractions that were 6 minutes apart and climbing. Some of the family drove out- Aunt Grayson and Grandma and Grandpa. But we were sent home. Five hours later Ashley had contractions again sometimes two minutes apart. But again they subsided. It took another week of mild contractions and more discomfort. Getting our house ready, Ashley thought her water had broken. So we went on a walk. A good long walk. The boys did not complain as we took in the sights of the neighborhood. When we returned, Ashley felt it was about 50/50 about whether her not her water had ruptured. We got home and got the boys ready in bed. Ashley came in with big eyes- he water had broken for sure, and there was no more doubt about it. We tried to put the boys to bed, it was about 8:30 on Monday the 9th. We called Ashley's parents and they begun their trek from Raleigh. We called John and Katherine McPherson, friends who are also expecting, to come sit in the house after the boys were asleep and before the grandparents got there. John and Katherine showed up, we hugged them goodbye, and head to the hospital. It was cold but we didn't feel it.

The triage nurse agreed that he water had broken before we even put our stuff down in triage, we were headed straight for Labor and Delivery. Ashley was calm and collected. We called family and paced around the room. The nurses came and went and the Doctor, Dr. Helman, stopped by and shared a story or two. She's chatty. We liked that about her. She told us that she was on-call and wouldn't be leaving the hospital. I told her that each of the other births progressed quickly- especially after 5-6cm.
We took a walk and counted contractions. Sometime around Midnight Ashley was not herself- the pain was throwing off her breathing.
She was expressing her fears that she was too tired after working all day and worried she wouldn't have enough strength. She wanted to talk about pain medications.
I called the nurse to come in. She checked on the progress. 5cm- only. The time was 1:05. She looked at me as if wondering to set up the pain meds. We were stuck in the unknown. If this was going to continue for another hour, she would need the medication. But if things were to develop quickly, the medicine would make the birth riskier and deliver a drugged baby. We held off. The nurse never left the room. She called for a cart to prepare for the birth- following our previous warning that the babies came quickly.
All of a sudden Ashley felt the need to push. She was on all fours and the contractions were coming to fast for her to flip over and find a position. The nurse checked again, even though it had only been 8 minutes since the last check. 10 cm. She called again for the cart- then said into her phone, "If you can't get the cart, just get the doctor and come on." Ashley held the urge to push for two more contractions, each a minute apart or less. The doctor came in and told Ashley it was OK to push. The bed had not been broken down, the stirrups were not extended, yet Dr. Helman remained calm. She told Ashley that if the baby wanted to come out this way, then so be it. Ashley was out-of body- and did not hear Dr. Helman say she could push. She tried to hold through another contraction and I finally got her attention that she could push. She did and Avery was born, 10 second later. The doctor called it half a push. From the check at 1:05 when she was 5cm, to when the baby was born, was 16 minutes. Avery Kathleen Pugh was born at 1:21 in the morning, weighing 5lbs 5oz. and measuring 19 inches long. The nurse who saw us through it all, Nurse Rhonda, hugged me, and after the room was cleared told Ashley and I that we were "amazing to watch. Excellent communicators- even without saying a word."
I smiled and said, "When it's your third time- and you're madly in love, it makes things easier." Ashley grimaced by the PDA.
Rhonda took us downstairs where we settled in for a few hours before sunrise. We took turns holding our little angel. She reminds me of goodness- or pure love wrapped in a tiny body, wrapped in warm soft skin. We spent the day of the 10th in the hospital, where this picture was taken, thanks to Photographer Grandma Ruth  and Photographer's assistant, (the one who makes people laugh) Grandpa Jeff. It snowed that day, but it didn't stick.

Avery came home on February 11th in the afternoon. Thomas was done with school and came along for the ride.
The 12th brought a massive snowstorm that snowed us in for three days. The morning of the 12th, Grandpa Jeff and I traveled to Lowe's to purchase a down-stairs freezer. The snow started around 3pm on the 12th, which was the nine-year anniversary of the day that Ashley and I were engaged. We both were too tired and missed even commenting on this anniversary. But we tell ourselves that we are too in love with our family and wrapped up in the moment to dwell on a life before we had these angels.